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- Jill (Julia Davis) talking to her husband Terry who is dying of
cancer; from the dark, British television comedy, "Nighty
Night." |
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Jill: "No point in both of us getting depressed." - Jill (Julia Davis) talking to her husband Terry who is dying of
cancer; from the dark, British television comedy, "Nighty
Night." |
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From the season finale of "Six Feet Under"(2004 season). The late Nathaniel Fisher, Sr. speaks with his son David: Dad: "You're not even grateful, are you?" David: "Grateful? For the worst fucking experience of my life?" Dad: You hang on to your pain like it means something. Like its worth something. Well let me tell you it's not worth shit. Let it go! (Looks up to heaven) Infinite possibilities and all he can do is whine." David: "Well, what am I suppose to do?" Dad: "What do you think? You can do anything you lucky bastard...you're alive! What's a little pain compared to that?" David: "It can't be so simple." Dad: "What if it is?" (They embrace and watch the rain).
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"This has nothing to do with the patient;
it's about you. You are afraid of death. And you
can't be! You're in medicine and you have to accept the fact that
everything we do here is a stall. We're just trying to keep
the game going. That's it. But, ultimately, it always ends up
the same way." |
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"Dead broad off the table!" |
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"Let the minutes reflect that Nina has
put a dead person on the table." |
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2001
Golden Globe-Winning Series! From Six Feet Under (Season finale, episode #13, "Knock, Knock") Tracy Blair (mourning her Aunt Lillian and speaking privately to Nate): "Why do people die?" Nate: (after a long pause) "To make
life important. Tracy: "Yeah, she did." Nate: "And you can be happy for her
for living a life, well-lived. |
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"It's hard. I go to a funeral, and they
be like, 'Why you tellin' no jokes?' It's a funeral, man!" - Rush
Hour 2's Chris Tucker on feeling pressured to be funny all the
time, on E! Online (source: the special Fall
Double Issue of Entertainment Weekly).
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"Mourning the loss of someone we love is happiness compared to having to live with someone we hate." - Jean de La Bruyere |
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"The final reward of the dead - to die no more." - Nietzsche |
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"We spend our immortal years (ages 12 to 40) not thinking about death, our middle years (41 - 60) trying not to think about death, and our later years (61 - 115) trying not to die." - author Greg Palmer, from his book Death: The Trip
of a Lifetime. |
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From Six Feet Under (Episode nine, "Life is Too Short") Brenda (to Nate and her brother Billy): "You know what I find interesting? When you lose your spouse, you are called a widow or widower. If you are a child and lose your parents, then you're an orphan. But, what's the word to describe a parent who loses a child? I guess that's just too fucking awful to have a name." |
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From Six Feet Under (Episode six, "The Room") Nate (Peter Krause) talks to his father's ghost in a run-down, one-room apartment his father kept in trade for a funeral service. Dad: "...(I) know the meaning of life." Nate: "That seems fairly useless." Dad: "Yeah I know. Life is wasted on the living."
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"Those of us who've spent some time in the
agricultural sector...understand how unfair the death penalty is - death tax is
- and we need to get rid of it. I don't want to get rid of the death
penalty. Just the death tax."
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"Smooth as chalk dust you'd laugh
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"Death isn't death They're balls |
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(from David Mamet's movie, "State & Main")
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Opening segment of "Friends" holiday episode
(12/14/00). Phoebe brings a ceramic skull to Monica and Chandler's
apartment.
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"If you die when there's no one watching, -Marilyn Manson from "Lamb of God," a cut from the "Holy Wood (In the Shadow of the Valley of Death") release.
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"I wanted no part of it. Look what happened to Alec Guinness. Here's one of the greatest artists of the last century, and all people know him for today is having played Obi-Wan Kenobi. I wouldn't want that sort of thing to be my epitaph." -Billy Crudup on why you won't find him in a Star Wars film, on ifilm.com.
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"I think in the last six months, we've probably buried 20 fishing rods." -Lombard, IL funeral director Robert Van Staalduinen, on the growing desire for personal touches in funerals (Chicago Tribune)
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"After all, to the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure." -Dumbledore, from "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone"
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"Why don't they make gravestones look cheerier?" -Spinal Tap band members at Elvis' grave (additional footage added to the "This is Spinal Tap" DVD; film originally released in 1984). SPINAL TAP RULES!
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Catherine Romano: "Funny how life works, the different paths.... "Junior" Soprano: "Yeah, all leading to the cemetery." - The Sopranos, March 26, 2000 (the second best show on television - I don't care what anyone says, Sports Night rules!!!)
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"Yeah, the rituals are intense, arcane and some of them are just perverse. I mean, the stuff that we put in the movie is tame in comparison. Like the 'rebirth ritual' where a guy lays naked in a coffin....George W. Bush was (in Skull & Bones). So, if that man gets elected President, I will never, ever be able to take him seriously. C'mon, you were in that coffin!" - Joshua Jackson on the model for the Skulls' secret society on Bigstar (from Entertainment Weekly 4-14-00).
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* | "Everybody dies. Sooner or
later." - Bruce Willis, as a hit man in "The Whole Nine Yards" |
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"I don't want to achieve immortality through my work, I want to achieve it through not dying." - Woody Allen
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you'll be alive."
- Zig Zigler |
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"When I die, you talk, I'll listen." - Jack Lemmon, as Morrie, talking about visiting his grave, from the t.v. presentation of "Tuesdays with Morrie." |
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"The executioner is, I believe, very expert....and my neck is very slender." - Anne Boleyn, kneeling at the block in 1536 (from "Dead Men Talking" of the Dubious Achievements of the Millennium/Esquire/January 2000) |
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"Is this safe?" - William Palmer, testing the trapdoor before being hanged in 1856 (from "Dead Men Talking" of the Dubious Achievements of the Millennium/Esquire/January 2000)
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"Folks, you're about to see a baked Appel." - George Appel, just before he was electrocuted in 1928 (from "Dead Men Talking" of the Dubious Achievements of the Millennium/Esquire/January 2000) |
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"Congratulations! You're
standing on your very own graves!" |
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Frasier: We all have to be prepared when the cold hand
of death knocks at (There's a well-timed knock at his front door) Frasier to Niles: Will you get that? (Third episode of "Frasier" for the 1999-2000 television
season; this |
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It's true no man is an island. But if you string a bunch of dead guys together, it makes a pretty good raft. - Max Cannon, author of the comic strip, "Redmeat." |
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Ross: I just don't want my tombstone to
read, "Ross Geller, Three Divorces." |
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Joey: I don't want to die! |
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"You look pretty good for a dead guy."
Rosie (Maria Bello) to Porter (Mel Gibson) in "Payback." |
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"The father of the multiplex movie theater died this week.....His funeral will be held on Saturday at 12:20, 2:40, 6:30 and 10:15." - Dennis Miller from Dennis Miller Live (as reported in Entertainment Weekly) |
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"Everybody I want to work with is dead. Like Winston Churchill. I'd get him to come and talk over one of my tracks." - U.K. pop star Robbie Williams (from an interview in Entertainment Weekly's Summer Double "IT" Issue 1999). |
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"I love dead, hate living." - Boris Karloff as Frankenstein in "The Bride of Frankenstein," recently resurrected in the Academy-Award nominated movie, "Gods and Monsters." |
* | Salvatore "Sonny" Philip Bono, former mayor of Palm Springs (CA) and pop-singer, is buried in Desert Memorial Park in Palm Springs. His gravestone inlcludes the song lyric: "And the beat goes on." (Obviously not a reference to his heart). |
* | Francis Albert Sinatra is also buried in Desert Memorial Park and his monument displays the song title "The Best is Yet to Come." Sinatra's new neighbors, besides Sonny Bono, include song and dance man Busby Berkely, actor William "The Thin Man" Powell, and actor Cameron Mitchell. For more information, check out "Visit a graveyard after you golf!" in our Loose Dirt section. |
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"A street magician has buried himself in a six-foot-by-two-foot glass coffin - or as we refer to it here in Manhattan, a studio apartment." - David Letterman, discussing David Blaine's publicity stunt, on Late Night. |
* | "I'm not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens" - Woody Allen (suggested by gravedigger J.Turner at Eton College in England). |
* | "I would hope that's not what's going to be written on my gravestone: 'They were really hers.'" - Yasmine Bleeth, talking breasts, in Redbook (January 1999). |
* | "There are no luggage racks on a hearse." - Louise Czuba |
* | "You are going to die of something eventually. You might as well die tanned." - Nichole Dornin, a University of Pittsburgh senior, on ignoring health hazards by basking on the beach in Florida (3/11/97, Chicago Tribune). |
* | About the after life: "I've always liked the notion of meeting the great figures in history. Then I think, what if it's like high school and all the cool dead people don't want to hang out with me. Mozart will tell me he's busy, but then I'll see him out with Shakespeare and Lincoln." - Niles Crain from the Frasier episode where Eddie deals with doggy depression. |
* | "When I die I want it to be on my 100th birthday, at my beach house on Maui, and I want my husband to be so upset he has to drop out of college." - Roz from the Frasier episode where Eddie suffers from doggy depression. |
* | "Whom do you side with, Burt Reynolds or Loni Anderson? They don't interest me. I find dead people captivating. Errol Flynn in his prime - nobody living can hold a candle to him!" - actress/performance artist Ann Magnuson (Entertainment Weekly interview (11/3/95). |
* | You're taken to a projection room and shown all the possibilities - like, had you taken the subway instead of the cab, this would have happened. If you'd majored in chemistry instead of theater, this would have happened. That's the movie I'd like to watch through eternity." - actress/performance artist Ann Magnuson, on life after death |
* | "You can't think of this as a car. It's like a big fiberglass vault." - Robert Miller, caretaker of a Pennsylvania cemetery where George Swanson was buried at his request in his 1984 Corvette. |
* | In a recent interview, Details magazine asked Steven Tyler from Aerosmith how he would describe his funeral. Tyler replied, "Some kind of Bourbon Street celebration....and then I'd like to have my ashes spread all over the beach. So even after I'm dead, I'm still gonna get in girls' pants." |
* | "To sleep; perchance to dream; ay, there's the rub; For in that sleep of death what dreams may come, When we have shuffled off this mortal coil...." - Hamlet, Act 3, Scene 1 |
* | "How were the circus receipts today at Madison Square Garden?" - P.T. Barnum* |
* | "Now comes the mystery." - Henry Ward Beecher* |
* | "Waiting are they? Well, goddamn'em, let'em wait!" - Ethan Allen* |
* | "We're in the estate furniture business. We buy furniture from dead people." - Peter Boyle, as "Ox" Callahan, in the movie "While You Were Sleeping." |
* | "Here lies my wife: Here let her lie/Now she's at rest, and so am I" - John Dryden's epitaph for his wife |
* | "Do not go gentle into that good night, old age should burn and rave at close of day; rage, rage against the dying of the light." - Dylan Thomas |
* | Roger Maris' grave in Holy Cross Cemetery in Fargo, North Dakota reads: "61 in '61, Against All Odds." |
* | "I'll walk you home." - Buffy the Vampire Slayer to Angel her Vampire boyfriend, as they romantically walk through a cemetery at night (from "Some Assembly Required" - originally aired September 22, 1997) |
* | Jack Beglinger of Orlando, CA reports that: Ripley - of "Believe It or Not" is buried in Odd Fellow Cemetery, Santa Rosa, California in the family plot with his parents. His tombstone has his name and the "Ripley - Believe It or Not" logo as the last words. |
* | Mel Blanc, the voice of many Warner Brothers animated favorites, has a tombstone which reads: "That's All Folks!" |
* | Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche said: "In heaven, all the interesting people are missing." |
* | "I'm losing it." - Frank Sinatra's last words, according to Daily Variety's Army Archerd. |
* | "(Tupac Shakur's death) could have been prevented ..There's a lesson to be learned about rap - and rock and roll as a whole: You have to control your speed and pump your brakes sometimes. Tupac's death is no different than James Dean's or anybody else's who was a star and pushed it too hard." - Rapper-turned-actor ICE-T on E! Online (as reported in Entertainment Weekly). |
* | "Till death do us part, Marie. After that, you're on your own." - Frank (Peter Boyle), explaining to his wife why he sold half their burial plot, on Everybody Loves Raymond. |
* | "I am to die for!"- Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy just before she kisses/kills two asylum guards and frees Mr. Freeze in "Batman and Robin" (1997). |
* | "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with a lot of pleasure."-Clarence Darrow |
* | "I Told You I Was Sick" - from a gravestone in Key West, Florida. |
* | In his book The Secret Word is Groucho (1976), the film and television comedian suggested the following epitaph for himself: Here Lies Groucho Marx and Lies and Lies and Lies. P.S. He never kissed an ugly girl. |
* | "I start every morning with the New York Times. The first thing I do when I get up is read the obituary column. If my name isn't in it, I get dressed."- Alan King |